Before reading, just realize: this is THE list ranking the films in the correct order. This is not opinion, this is fact. If you came to this page with another viewpoint, please use this list as a scorecard or “answer sheet” to help correct you. There can be no real debate here: this is Truth.

This list is for real Star Wars fans–not for those who lick the boots of any director who slaps ‘Star Wars’ on a movie title. For example George Lucas is acknowledged here as both a genius … but also someone who then went mad with power and desperately tried to destroy everything he created. Like if Leonardo da Vinci insanely decided in a senile booze-induced bender he no longer liked his Mona Lisa and painted a mustache over her and said THAT was actually what he meant all along. But I digress … below is the list of all Star Wars movies ranked WORST to BEST. Enjoy.

#11 – Attack of the Clones (DEAD LAST!)

When it comes to the Star Wars prequels, there are two schools of thought:

1. True Star Wars fans who understand they’re utter garbage — these are the ones who realize that the prequels were both dull and convoluted… that they created unnecessary plot holes within the original trilogy, and that they ruined both the mystique of the Force and the reputation of one of the greatest fictional villains of all time.
2. Dinglewad Idiots. On the other end of the [very wrong] spectrum, there are those that somehow/someway genuinely enjoyed Episodes I-III because of how they expanded upon the Star Wars mythos and how they answered many questions that, for better or worse, weren’t touched upon in the original trilogy.

I wasn’t even going to include Episodes I-III in this list at all, as I don’t personally feel they are real Star Wars films. But for the sake of The List, I’ll bend to my lesser judgement and force myself to rank the rubbish with the greats…

As for Attack of the Clones, this film ranks as the worst ever in the ‘Star Wars’ franchise (air quotes intentional). Calling it a Star Wars movie is really like calling a lady bug a lady. With a terrible script and lackluster performances from the cast, it’s a regular ‘chicken or the egg’ dilemma trying to figure out what caused this film to crash and burn so badly. With a decent script, could Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman’s dull-as-dishwater personalities and awkward chemistry have been passable? Likewise, could stronger acting chops make up for lines that were seemingly pulled from the pages of a grocery store romance novel? The world may never know just what George Lucas was thinking when he gave the thumbs-up to the middle school play-style performances of the cast, or when he green-lit gems of dialogue such as, “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth.”

While some idiots can somehow look past these significant flaws, it’s quite difficult to ignore the overuse of CGI that literally stares you in the face throughout the entire film. With CGI, **less is more**, but Lucas was given an inch and took 12 parsecs (remember, it’s a unit of distance, not time). Believability is key, and most of us would rather see Yoda as a puppet than a Sonic the Hedgehog-esque ball of fury bouncing around a green screen set during lightsaber battles.

#10 – The Phantom Menace

While the last entry may have been a bit long-winded, there’s thankfully slightly less to hate about The Phantom Menace. Still, this film manages to single-handedly ruin the magic behind the most enigmatic concept in Star Wars lore: the Force. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it – right? Apparently not if you’re George Lucas, who felt it was necessary to give an explanation to the one thing fans didn’t actually want to be explained.

To be fair, we did get an explanation from Obi-Wan Kenobi in A New Hope: “Well, the Force is what gives a Jedi his power. It’s an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the galaxy together…. A Jedi can feel the force flowing through him.”

This simple line of dialogue helped summarize what the Force was, masking it with just enough obscurity to instill an ominous sense of wonder and mystery. However, Lucas, notorious for not leaving well enough alone, used Liam Neeson’s Qui-Gon Jinn as a vehicle to deliver a new explanation in the form of midi-chlorians: microscopic life forms that reside within all living cells, allowing certain beings to use the Force if they’re sensitive enough to its powers. With the ‘canonical’ introduction of midi-chlorians, George Lucas ultimately eliminated decades of appropriately ambiguous enchantment from the Star Wars universe.

Outside of this travesty, though, there’s still a handful of redeeming qualities that keep The Phantom Menace sitting atop its sequel in terms of quality. Although the Podrace scene seems to take up a disproportionate amount of time from the film, it did lead to the incredibly fun Star Wars Episode I: Racer game for the Nintendo 64, which still holds up to the test of time. Likewise, The Phantom Menace not only included one of the worst things to come out of the prequels; it also included one of the best, which, of course, is Darth Maul.

That scene near the end of the film where he’s standing there with his lightsaber ignited and his red face dripping with disdain and the music of John Williams slowly building and booming to a roar in the background to form an epic crescendo … ah, it was a thing of beauty! That moment of raw emotion (and then the epic light saber duel to follow) makes for some of the best scenes in any Star Wars movie. Sadly … it was too little far too late. And one excellent scene cannot a good movie make. Same situation with The Last Jedi — but we’ll come to that in a bit.

#9 – Revenge of the Sith

I choke a bit to admit it, but in all honesty Revenge of the Sith is overall a … stomachable movie. The problem, though, is that the real payoff comes from the set-up in Episodes I and II; and, sadly, Episode III isn’t nearly good enough to redeem its predecessors. In fact, the real misses in this film are the quintessential facepalms of the entire prequels.

Like Attack of the Clones, Revenge of the Sith also suffers from the marionette puppet show that is Anakin and Padme’s relationship. Fortunately, a better script and improved performances by Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman helped alleviate some of the pain points from Episode II.

As far as action goes, Revenge of the Sith definitely holds the throne for best lightsaber battles in the prequel trilogy, particularly the one between Anakin and Obi-Wan that attempts to pull at the heartstrings with limited success. In fact, this scene actually does a decent job establishing the seething hate Darth Vader has for Obi-Wan by the time A New Hope rolls around.

Does the movie create glaring plot holes? Absolutely. For example, why does Leia say she remembers her mother in Return of the Jedi if Padme dies immediately after childbirth??? Are there cheesy moments? Of course! Once you hear Darth Vader scream “NOOOOOO!,” it can never be unheard. Still, on the whole, Revenge of the Sith is the slightest ray of sunshine on an otherwise cloudy day. But “least bad” of the prequels, to me, is not the kind of movie I would ever sit down and make time to watch.

And again, this point cannot be overstated: Vader shouting “NOOOOO!” like a cartoonish Loonie-Toons villain was the nail in the coffin of a mighty franchise and the final heap of dung Lucas shoveled onto his once-immaculate reputation. He spent tens of millions of dollars to break the hearts of his fans and piss on priceless art. And in doing so he declined in the eyes and hearts of millions from a brilliant film magnate (who would otherwise have been remembered as a near god-like visionary) instead reduced in history to a senile dufus of his own making. Like the pre-pubescent Anakin of his abysmal Prequel films, the irony is not lost that Lucas turned into the modern-day Vader of the real world film universe.

#8 – The Last Jedi

**(MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW)**

Before I rant on its evils, I’ll discuss some of this film’s good parts. For as divisive as this film may be, you can’t deny The Last Jedi’s merits.  This movie contains some of the BEST Star Wars — but sadly some its absolute WORST. I feel as ambivalent as a person can be after watching a film. It’s good and bad: awful and wonderful all at the same time. It’s lukewarm; which as the Bible tells us: makes me want to spit it out of my mouth.

Rian Johnson completely flips the script on what fans have come to expect from the Star Wars franchise, takings major (calculated?) risks rather than playing it safe. Some of these pay off; but many don’t, to the detriment of the franchise.

Everyone wants to know who Rey’s parents are? Well, guess what – they’re not important. Fans think Snoke is someone really important from Star Wars lore? Nope, and just for good measure, we’ll kill him off altogether.

These are decisions that represent a major change to the status quo of the franchise. Johnson eliminated the preconceived notion that our heroes are defined by their lineage. Furthermore, he bucked the trend of Star Wars films relying on a mysterious, shadowy figure lurking in the background by instead using Snoke to catapult Kylo Ren into the forefront as the true big bad of the trilogy. And on top of all that, Johnson proved that a Star Wars film can actually be (sometimes) funny without being annoying. Was the humor always on point? Absolutely not – in fact I rolled my eyes more than I laughed out loud. I personally don’t think a “your momma” joke belongs in Star Wars; but on the other hand the slow fade out of the ironing droid was actually really funny.

At the end of the day, The Last Jedi changes everything we know about the Star Wars franchise, setting the stage for an incredibly promising future. Not to mention that one of BEST scenes I’ve ever seen in Star Wars is in this movie: the light saber duel Kylo and Rey have with Snoke’s guards immediately following his assassination. Wow. That scene is EPIC. Unique and powerful!

NOW – as for what sucked about it: sadly, the list of plot holes and stupidity makes for a entire LIST in and of itself! I could write a small book on the things Johnson did plain WRONG (objectively from both a Star Wars viewpoint and a movie-making standpoint). I’ll enumerate just a few here:

• in the first star wars film, and once again in Empire, it is established that star destroyers are hard to outrun. So the basic premise of a “slow motion chase” and that rebel cruisers are just slightly faster is lame.
• after an opening where Poe cripples a dreadnought with one fighter, and Kylo Ren along with only two wing men, cause significant damage to the Resistance flag ship, the first order announces that fighter cannot attack out of range of cruiser support. this has never happened before and in fact if modeled after WWII fighters like George Lucas conceived of, then the exact purpose of a fighter compliment is to extend the range of a fleet.
• going back to the damage to “the Raddus” caused by Ren, we later see people on the bridge of the ship, completely undamaged. what???
• why do they need to find a base to make a f-ing call? their flagship can’t call people? just bad/cheap writing!
  
• if there are tiny shuttles that can travel in hyperspace, then why not send people to get help instead of finding a base just to make a call?
  
• (maybe more of a pet peeve than plot hole) why do the big cannons on the first order command ship arc when they fire? there is no gravity, they should fly straight! Similiar point with the bombing at the beginning of the film (but i suppose this can be explained away in the canon of the original series — maybe gravity works differently or the weapons are adjusted to simulate gravity in some way? I assume this is the case because tie-fighers do drop bombs in Empire trying to flush the Falcon out of the asteroid field)
• since when do laser cannons run out of juice? or hit things but have no real effect?
• Laura Dern’s character?? I mean — seriously, there is no point; she is enigmatic for no reason – when morale is critically low. why not use Admiral Akbar? it would be better then killing him off so unceremoniously. Such wasted opportunities! 
• Kylo Ren spends all the magical conversations talking about letting go of the past, but when he and Rey have no one left to answer to, he leaves nothing. he wants to keep the first order and keep doing the same thing. 
• the title of “the Last Jedi” well he’s not, neither is Rey. no other star wars film has a deliberately misleading name. 
• the Luke Skywalker we know goes to great lengths and takes extreme risks to lure Darth Vader away from the dark side, but he is worried that his Nephew MIGHT go to the dark side, so rather than save him, he is damn close to just executing him in his sleep? WTF??
• Benicio Del Toro’s character knows about the “cloaked” shuttles that are taking the crew off the Raddus. Finn and Rose don’t know, how the f does he know?!?!
• The first order is just saving their good scanning for special occasions? “we are using cloaked ships” “ha HA! we have a cloaked ship detector! but only for special occasions because why would we use our best detection equipment when we are tenaciously hunting down our enemies?”
• not plot holes, but dropped plots from TFA Knights of Ren? Rey’s flashes through the force? the origin of the First order?
• in TFA Luke is said to have gone to seek out the first Jedi Temple. he even leave behind a map so that ” the right people” could find him.
• if Phasma’s armor is/was blaster proof, how was Finn able to threaten her into lowering the shields of Starkiller base in TFA?
• when Leia goes all space Marry Poppins (worst scene in any Star Wars movie by the way — INCLUDING the prequels), how does she get back into the ship? when that door opens, everyone standing there should have been sucked out into space!
• a.) creating a ” shocking” realization that someone is selling arms to both sides. this goes nowhere! it’s for no reason. b.) it’s established canon that the empire established or bought out shipyards to exclusively create all their ships, and rebellion sympathetic corporations gave ships to the rebellion. but since Incom updated the X-wing to serve in the new republic fleet. it’s already there, they didn’t buy ships from arms dealers.
• On that last point, I won’t even really get into this now, but I have a HUGE problem with the entire Post-modernism “moral relativity” motif that insidiously has worked its way into so many blockbusters the last 5-10 years. The “well, is there really a good guy and bad guy or just lighter and darker shades of grey?” paradigm is both over-played, stupid, and un-rewarding. It strips the viewer of real satisfaction (I WANT a good guy and a bad guy; I don’t want moral relativism in my movies). It’s also so NOT Star Wars. It’s the opposite of what Star Wars is and should be about. End rant

And last but not least – what I feel deserves an explanation is this — where the hell is Lando?? The fact they haven’t brought him back yet is just sacrilege in my mind and a HUGE missed opportunity. I mean they even teased us and slapped us in the face with it with that rushed video call to Maz: she speaks of a master code breaker and gambler. Wow — if that doesn’t scream Lando I don’t know what does.

Anyway, brass tacks: this movie was a mixed bag. It was a meal of food with many pieces of succulent prime rib cooked to perfection; but next to it on the same plate was fresh steaming pieces of steaming cow manure.

In all though, the film is about 100x better than the prequels. And it was also 100x worse than the originals. So despite its wasted potential, it falls right in the middle of the list.

#7 – The Rise of Skywalker

Okay, so as stated, “The Last Jedi” and Rian Johnson basically ruined everything lovable about Star Wars. This made it extremely difficult (read: impossible) to come back and for J.J. Abrams to even have a fair shot at redemption. In the end, like a loving wife of a savage drunk, he got down on his hands and knees and tried to wipe up all the vomit and alcohol-fed destruction of his predecessor — but the damage was done!

What we ended up in this film was was a bunch of nonsensical sketching of a plot and “reveals” that came out of absolutely no where. Rey is somehow Palpatine’s granddaughter….? And yes, you heard that right: Palpatine is somehow back. Like some evil villian’s dues ex machina, he’s just … BACK. Not only that, but he’s apparently been the mastermind the entire time and actually CREATED Snoke. He did this using … dark powers. Don’t question it!!

It is all beyond cartoonish. It’s insulting to the fans, the viewers, and just further spits on the franchise. It’s savage and cruel on so many levels.

Oh, but forget that for a second. It gets worse. The plot holes are staggering in this film! Here are just a very small number of glaring plot holes worth mentioning:

• How Did Palpatine Survive His Death In Return Of The Jedi?
• Who was Actually Having Sex With Palpatine Anyway? Seriously!
• Why Was Palpatine Still Growing Snokes?
• How Did Poe “Lightspeed Skip” In The Falcon?
• How Did The TIE Fighters Chase The Falcon Through Hyperspace?
• How Has Luke’s Lightsaber Been Repaired?
• Poe Dameron’s New Backstory Is Lame and Confusing
• The Sith Dagger Makes Absolutely No Sense
• Why Did Threepio Know The Language Of The Sith?
• How Did Kylo Ren Get Off Kef Bir?
• How Does Luke Repair His X-Wing?
• Just What’s The Deal With Palpatine’s Secret Fleet? Come On! Seriously?? Seriously!?

The massive plot holes throughout this film could fill a sarlac pit. Or, I don’t know — maybe the sarlac would vomit them all back up since they’re so gross even for him. She? It? (I don’t want to risk a Disney ban on this page for daring to mis-gender the sarlac!) #woke!

The sheer stupidity of pivoting so hard with Rey’s backstory is similarly hard to forgive. It’s an ending as much akin to a punch in the gut as Game Of Thrones‘ final season on HBO or the final few episodes of Dexter. Why couldn’t Rey have simply been Obiwan’s granddaughter? Wouldn’t that have been so much more satisfying … and actually made a modicum of sense?

The ridiculous story arc(s) laid bare in Rise of Skywalker as Palpatine magically enters the final scenes at the end of the post-ROTJ trilogy is just a giant jigsaw puzzle that no one remotely wanted or could have possibly connected. In a word – it was IMPOSSIBLY BAD. So so so bad! This hot turd of a film had very few redeeming qualities … other than bringing Lando back. That was very exciting to see. He even says … The Line!

BUT, all that said, this film is still not nearly as bad a film in the trilogy as the postmodern #woke garbage of The Last Jedi. And certainly not as tragically bad as the prequels.

#6 – Solo: A Star Wars Story

I won’t rant and rave so much going forward. It’s only when you love a thing that you get so passionate about it; and, that much more, when something you love is destroyed and crapped on by people who are just in it for the naked cash grab, you get VERY angry.

That said, Solo was a good movie. I enjoyed it a lot. It holds up well — other than the very end (after credit) scene where you “learn” that Darth Maul is somehow alive after being cut in half (yes, this is somehow “cannon” now despite being epicly retarded). But without giving away spoilers, this film is worth seeing and, as opposed to Anakin’s embarrassing backstory from the prequils, I feel Solo’s backstory DID need some telling. And this was the perfect movie to do it.

Solo also gave a less-than-subtle nod (in fact the entire main plot of the film) to explain how a parsec isn’t a unit of distance in reference to the Kessel Run, but in fact is a unit of time. The main arc of Solo, in fact, is the story of Han Solo’s ‘Kessel Run’ bragged about in Episode 4. It was a great way to turn a flippant writer’s gaff into an entire film. Pretty impressive, actually!

In conclusion: good film. Worth watching! Not a great film for re-watchability like all the rest in the Star Wars universe, but again a GOOD film. Go see it.

#5 – The Force Awakens

When The Force Awakens was released, fans had been waiting between 10 and 32 years for a new Star Wars film, depending on which side of the aforementioned prequel fence they fall on. In any case, longtime fans were appeased, and a whole new generation was introduced to the fandom that keeps on giving.

One of the major (and unarguable) complaints people have with The Force Awakens is that it’s essentially a carbon copy of A New Hope. A young, aspiring pilot, living on a desert planet; establishing a core trio of characters, as well as a droid with crucial data; a battle to destroy a massive, world-destroying weapon – it’s the same game board, just with different pieces. However, this was a conscious decision made by director J.J. Abrams, easing fans back into Star Wars by combining elements both old and new.

The Force Awakens also adds an incredibly compelling new villain to the Star Wars universe in the form of Kylo Ren. It was clear that he was being groomed for a complex and intriguing character arc that will take the full trilogy to be fully realized – hopefully, it turns out more successful than Anakin in the prequels. Yes, when we meet him he’s whinny as all hell; but I think this isn’t a bad thing: it will allow him to grow as a character and transition into his evil. I feel his story arc will hopefully prove to be most rewarding of any Star Wars character (tbd).

All things considered, the tasteful nostalgia blended with a cast of dynamic new characters make The Force Awakens one of the greatest Star Wars movies to date.

#4 – Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

Sometimes certain questions don’t need to be answered (see: midi-chlorians). Other times, answering those questions presents an intriguing opportunity to explore new grounds with decades-old concepts. That’s exactly what we get from Rogue One: A Star Wars Story.

While fans weren’t clamoring since 1977 to find out how the Rebel Alliance stole the Death Star plans, Lucasfilm was able to take this concept and run with it, creating a film that’s unlike any of the installments in the core Star Wars saga. It’s a dark, gritty war movie that just so happens to take place in the Star Wars universe. It’s a true standalone film, much like A New Hope would have been if not for the sequels and prequels. However, even though the mission is successful, Rogue One shows us that sometimes, victories can’t be celebrated by the victors.

Despite everything Rogue One does right, it’s not without its flaws. The movie takes the entirety of its 133-minute runtime to get from 0 to 60, but a strong third act makes up for the pacing problems earlier on. In fact, the majority of the problems with this film have nothing to do with the story or the performances by the actors, but rather with the overall production.

Aside from the pacing, the CGI used to recreate Peter Cushing’s Grand Moff Tarkin and Carrie Fisher’s Princess Leia was a bit distracting. Technology has come a long way, and while we’re about 99% of the way there, but there were certainly more practical options that could have been taken rather than resorting to motion capture.

Another thing that’s a bit distracting is the film’s score. Michael Giacchino is an incredible composer, but he’s no John Williams. Hearing the whispers of Williams’ original score in Giacchino’s composition was definitely a nice homage, but at times, it sounded a bit odd. Have you ever gone to a restaurant and heard the waiters and dishwashers sing a song that sounds almost like ‘Happy Birthday’, but they change some of the words for copyright reasons? Yeah, that’s how Giacchino’s score feels at times. And how Vader’s cartoonish quip about “choking on one’s aspirations” did not hit the bottom of the cutting room floor was beyond me (by far the worst line/scene in the film). Still, these are minor nitpicks.

Lastly, the movie boasts in its final minutes the absolute best scene in probably ANY movie ever. Darth Vader standing ominously in the smoke-filled locked room slowly igniting his saber will stop your soul for a second. And then immediately to have him single-handedly make the room full of escaping Rebel soldiers into his personal torture chamber was uncontrollable bad-assery. It was a scene of beauty and epic beyond all words!

Ultimately, Rogue One is a solid movie, setting the stage for what will hopefully be a successful run of Star Wars Anthology Series films.

#3 – Return of the Jedi

Much like Jar Jar Binks in Episode I, the Ewoks were a shameless cash grab used to appeal to the younger demographic, and the fact that they were able to take down an Imperial fleet with sticks and stones is utterly ridiculous. However, while this is taking place, we’re also treated to a classic dogfight between the Rebels and the Empire, as well as an epic duel between father and son. Even though the fight choreography leaves much to be desired, the emotional weight of the final battle between Luke and Darth Vader holds up today as some the most iconic and emotional scenes of any movie of all time.

Furthermore, we’re able to see the prophecy introduced in the prequels come full-circle, as the former Anakin Skywalker (the Chosen One) kills Emperor Palpatine. This is one of the few instances in which a concept introduced in the prequels actually adds gravitas to the original trilogy.

Although the events of The Force Awakens have shown us that the Rebel Alliance’s victory doesn’t result in peace for very long, Return of the Jedi still has a pleasing sense of finality that has yet to be replicated in another Star Wars film.

#2 – A New Hope

If I’m going to praise The Force Awakens for its reinterpretation of A New Hope, it’s only fitting that I rank the real deal higher on this list. After all, this is the film that started the fandom! And any true fan can’t seriously think of ranking any Star Wars films other than the original (despecialized) Episodes 4-6 as being in the top 3!

Part of what makes A New Hope so great is that it works both as a piece of the larger overall Star Wars franchise, but also as a standalone film. Sure, there would be a few loose threads, most notably Darth Vader’s whereabouts, but the film ends with the Rebels (seemingly) successfully defeating the Empire, so it’s not too much of a stretch for moviegoers to simply take this at face value.

There really isn’t much more that needs to be said, quite frankly. There’s a reason A New Hope was originally just titled Star Wars. This is the definitive installment in the unstoppable franchise.

#1 – Empire Strikes Back

Most hardcore Star Wars fans would agree that The Empire Strikes Back is by far the greatest film in the entire franchise.

While A New Hope was full of optimism and seemed to end in victory for the Rebels, The Empire Strikes Back was full of twists and turns and introduced true darkness and uncertainty to the saga. It also introduces an incredible array of stunning new surroundings unlike anything seen in Episode IV. From Hoth to Cloud City to the Dagobah system, this movie shows just how vast and diverse the galaxy truly is, growing by leaps and bounds from one film to the next.

Keeping with the theme of introductions, Episode V also introduces us to plenty of new faces. Obviously Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, and Princess Leia are the big three in terms of Star Wars characters, but The Empire Strikes Back is responsible for introducing some of the most iconic secondary characters to the universe. Where would Star Wars be without names like Yoda, Lando Calrissian, and Boba Fett? Let’s not forget Emperor Palpatine, either. Darth Vader was intimidating in A New Hope, but to learn that he was working under someone even more sinister was bone-chilling, to say the least.

Then, of course, there’s the big reveal. When Darth Vader reveals that he is Luke’s father, fans still get chills. Nothing in any of the Star Wars films can compare to this moment, both in terms of shock and scope, and it’s hard to imagine anything ever will.

Empire holds up as not just the best Star Wars film, but certainly as one of (and certainly to me) the best sci-fi film of all time. To my judgment it’s actually the best film of all time. It is quite nearly a perfect film—a classic story that is both dark, emotional, and prescient. For my money it can’t be beat.

— — — — —

And that’s the official ranking of all Star Wars films. You’re welcome! Feel free to correct your judgments and opinions accordingly, as/if needed. Good day to you.